“Finding out Sarah only had a few weeks to live was terrible but I’m so glad we were able to get married and build such strong memories in her final days.”

Posted 28th March 2022

The husband of a woman who passed away from an incurable brain tumour less than two weeks after they got married has shared their story to help others in the same situation.

Richard Hewitson and Sarah Peacock found out in early January that her aggressive brain tumour had spread to her brainstem. As Sarah didn’t know how much time she had left, they got family and friends involved and organised a fabulous church wedding on 22nd January with 72 guests and a reception at a luxury hotel and spa.

Very sadly, Sarah died on 1st February but Richard and family are grateful that they spent her final months building such happy memories with everyone.

Sarah’s diagnosis two years ago came as a total shock. Richard and Sarah had been enjoying successful careers and an active social life full of family and friends. Sarah loved her job as a primary school headteacher and had worked hard to build a thriving and caring culture there.

“Supporting those children was her favourite thing and she was so kind to them,” remembers Richard. “Sarah was brilliant and she loved her job. She was a lovely person and she was so generous.”

Then one day in May 2020 everything changed. “Sarah had been having piercing headaches and had gone to the doctor and been given painkillers and told to come back if it kept happening,” says Richard. “A couple of weeks later, she lost her balance and fell off a swing tyre she was sitting on at school. She said she was fine but they took her in for a CT scan and she was called back in the same day.

“I went over to the hospital as well and the consultant said she had what looked like a brain tumour. She had a MRI scan a week later, after steroids to reduce swelling in her brain, and that’s when we first saw the pictures of a big fluffy tumour covering most of the left side of her head.

“I felt like I’d been hit with a sledgehammer. People said ‘be strong, they know what they’re doing’ but I knew the success rates for brain tumours weren’t as good as for many other cancers. They seem to have a much higher chance of recurring.”

A biopsy showed that Sarah had a slow-growing tumour called an astrocytoma. Surgery wasn’t possible so Sarah was referred straight to The Clatterbridge Cancer Centre for six weeks of radiotherapy, followed by a year of chemotherapy.

As the months went by, Sarah and Richard began to look to the future. They spent time with loved ones and decided to move from Chester to Formby to be closer to Sarah’s family. Sarah began thinking about going back to work after her treatment.

“Not in the same role,” Richard recalls, “but maybe as a governor, still involved with the children and the school she helped to build. Things were good. Sarah was mentally well, looking to start building a new life in Formby with family around. It was going to be fantastic.”

After finishing chemo in June 2021, Sarah and Richard had a blissful summer together as she recuperated from treatment. They visited friends, went to Jersey on holiday and were busy househunting and making plans for the future.

“We were in high spirits when we went to see the consultant last October,” says Richard, “but unfortunately Sarah’s cancer had come back and this time it was more aggressive. She was put onto a different chemotherapy and this time it was palliative – it was about keeping Sarah alive as long as possible, rather than being able to fix anything.

“That was absolutely awful. The cancer was just little dots that weren’t affecting Sarah yet but we knew it was aggressive and in my head we were maybe looking at six to 12 months.”

Richard and Sarah enjoyed Christmas in their new home in Formby but her health began to worsen quite quickly. “I knew things were happening. She wasn’t eating well. One evening she rang me to ask where the bathroom was because she couldn’t remember. It was heartbreaking.”

In early January, they learned that the cancer had spread to Sarah’s brainstem. “Based upon that, the prognosis was four to six weeks,” says Richard. “Sarah hadn’t wanted to be in the room to hear that but I felt I needed to know so I could make sure that everything was in place so we could deal with it.

“Telling the family – it’s the most awful thing to happen. That four to six-week timescale was very, very hard. But what we did was we got married and we went for it bigtime. We had the wedding in Our Lady’s Church in Lydiate with Sarah’s old parish priest followed by a reception and full-on speeches at Formby Hall Golf Resort & Spa. Everybody got involved in organising it and we all managed to smash it in two weeks.

“It kept everybody moving forwards, working together, and it kept Sarah in amazing spirits. She knew it was happening and it was fantastic. It made those weeks that we’d been allowed such a positive period. We were able to do some amazing stuff in the weeks before she died and I am so grateful for that time.”

After the wedding, Sarah deteriorated rapidly. She had fallen about three days before the wedding and Sarah’s care team at The Clatterbridge Cancer Centre arranged additional support for her at home from community health teams, social care and the local hospice. Handrails, bed guards and other adaptations were also installed to help Sarah stay safe at home as her health worsened.

“The last three days, Sarah had her bed downstairs. We had a lot of family around and Sarah’s parish priest. It was nice to have everyone there, they kept us strong and pulled everything together for us. Sarah passed away at around 8am on 1st February.”

Despite the grief of losing Sarah just a few weeks ago, Richard was keen to share their story during Brain Tumour Awareness Month to help others who may be going through something similar.

One thing that made those final weeks easier was the fact that Sarah and Richard had already organised practical things including her benefits entitlement, pension and other paperwork. It’s something Richard would encourage people to do while they are still feeling well enough.

“It doesn’t mean you are accepting that you’re going to die – you can plan for the worst and hope for the best – but things like pensions can take a long time to sort out. It helped that we had got everything in order so we could have some great times, whatever happened.

“It meant that we could spend the last few weeks building great memories. People talk about bucket lists – going to Thailand or whatever – but we were able to build emotional buckets. We built strong, happy memories with our families and friends that we will all treasure for ever.”

Sarah also received extensive wraparound care from her team at The Clatterbridge Cancer Centre, which included support for those close to her. “The care, support and professionalism displayed by the entire team – every facet played a vital role in treating and supporting not just Sarah, but all of us.

“As well as the best medical care we could have ever hoped to receive, all her family and friends also took comfort from the fact that we knew Sarah was receiving the best holistic support available. It helped ease the anguish and upset we felt, and enabled the wedding at such short notice, at a time when everyone was just struggling to process what was happening. We all gained strength from the Clatterbridge team, especially her consultant Dr May and her clinical nurse specialists, Jill and Jan, along with the Maggie’s Centre and the team there.”

Dr Chloë May, Consultant Clinical Oncologist at The Clatterbridge Cancer Centre, who cared for Sarah, said: “Sarah was a wonderful lady with a hugely caring family to support her. It was a pleasure to look after her and she is sorely missed.

“Brain tumours like Sarah’s are incredibly complex with a huge impact on someone and their family. Caring for people such as Sarah involves providing care that looks at the whole person and the impact their condition is having on their life and those around them, as well as treating the cancer. Our Neuro-Oncology team is focused on holistic care and includes specialist nurses, allied health professionals and other colleagues – we all help patients and those close to them with the emotional and practical support that is so important.”

Pictures show Sarah and Richard on their wedding day.